NOT YOUR DAD'S 'WIT & WISDOM'!
Reason enough to embrace this book!
Do people give you peculiar looks when you make a witty observation or recount an amusing anecdote? If not - or just not often enough - don't worry. Help is at hand!
We can almost guarantee a significant change in your social life, if only you begin to carry this book with you at all times ... read aloud from it, whether or not encouraged to do so... explain the principles of Theropoda Buddhism... rename all the spiders in your house... fill awkward silences by trying out a few of the tongue twisters... the possibilities are extensive!
LET THIS BOOK RELEASE YOUR OWN HIDDEN PECULIARITIES AND RARE WISDOM!
The Not Much Is Sacred Songbook:
Parodies for Midwinter
and Other Occasions
Patricia A. Leslie
​
Revised, 2016 edition of holiday and everyday parodies; 42 pages; 32 original parodies; $8.99 (cover); 8x10"; paperback; perfect-bound; matte-gloss covers.
ISBN: 978-0-9971137-7-8
Patricia always works hard at melding witty lines with accurate scansion; every entry provides the original tune title and composer or source, in case of a need to double-check the melody. Lyrics are set to traditional melodies of the British Isles and well-known popular tunes. Part One, "Parodies for Midwinter", comprises a delightful baker's dozen of gently irreverent alternative-lyric holiday favourites, such as "Jolly Old Krampus", “The Pagan Drummer Person”, “Frosty the Pagan”, and “The Tofu Carol” (a kosher, vegetarian version of "The Boar’s Head Carol"!). When the winter holidays are over, Part Two, "Parodies for Other Occasions", offers 19 more, suitable for all kinds of gatherings, from Filk circles at science fiction conventions (“The Risin’ of The Steam”) to community song circles (“Lord of The Rings, The Musical: Get Me to Mount Doom on Time”).
From The Not Much is Sacred Songbook ...
"IN THIS MINE WHERE DWARVES LIVED"
Tune: On the Street Where You Live (Frederick Loewe)
Lyrics: Patricia A. Leslie ©2015
I have often walked in this mine before,
But a chill ne'er shivered so far up my spine before.
There's a Balrog, aye,
Several stories high;
It dwells here, in this mine where dwarves lived!
​
Please don't stop to stare, Pippin or Merry,
We don't have a lot of time, so dammit, just hurry!
Frodo's sword is blue,
Frankly I am too,
All at once, in this mine where dwarves lived!
. . .
Mercurial Tales: fiction on
the Para side of Normal
At the least likely time, any of us may find that we have crossed an invisible threshold, to just alongside what we have come to believe is Normal. In this collection, the author conducts readers and protagonists alike across that threshold, on excursions ranging from tongue-in-cheek to chilling: take a museum tour with a Trickster Deity… hike with hippies on a mystical mountain near San Francisco… sail the Pacific with only whales for company… honeymoon in a romantic old castle on the banks of Loch Ness… spend a monsoon season at a lonely outpost in India… go to college with vampires… meet someone new on the dance floor at a local club… discover that love is sometimes not blind, but invisible…
A novella, two novelettes and ten short stories ask and answer many burning questions of our time, on Paranormal Issues and Mysterious Occurrences… would a girl vampire have boy problems in college?… what is that flying around the room?… which country has the most romantic werewolves?… what do lab animals chat about?... is every dog our best friend?... are these the worst housemates ever?… is that a flying saucer?… what exactly is a burning question? Patricia A. Leslie invites her readers through the door of speculation, into a variety of alternate spaces, to spend some time exploring her Mercurial views - from tongue-in-cheek to chilling - of things both seen and unseen…
​
Print: $11.99; 6x9"; perfect bound; matte cover; 238 pp; distr: IngramSpark ISBN: Paperback 978-0-9971137-8-5
(sorry, no Ebook at this time)
A Very Pagan Holiday Songbook:
Midwinter and More
Patricia A. Leslie
​
Revised, 2016 edition; 25 pages; 29 songs (and 1 recipe!); $7.99 (cover);
8x10"; paperback; perfect-bound; matte-gloss covers.
ISBN: 978-0-9971137-4-7
Patricia’s popular collection of “Pagan-adapted” lyrics set to traditional melodies. The songs are divided into two sections: Part One, , and Part Two. Since most of the tunes are well-known, and those that are not, are easy to find online, the songbook simply provides lyrics, without any musical notation.
All the lyrics are written from the heart, with an unflagging sense of devotion to the environment, the wellbeing of Earth’s biosphere, and a sincere desire to contribute to the canon of vocal music available to followers of any Earth-based religion. Pagans, Heathens, and Pantheists will enjoy enhancing their seasonal celebrations with Part One, "Celebrating Midwinter". Delightful new lyrics are set to old, well-known tunes, such as “The Twelve Days of Eco-Awareness”, “Be Blessèd, Merry Pagan Folk” and “Good Pagan Folk Rejoice”. Then, as the wheel of the year turns, Part Two, "Circling the Year" offers a song for every Sabbat, from Brigid to Samhain, such as: “Triple Goddess Invocation” , “She’s Got the Whole World (In Her Hands)”, “Invocation of The Elements”, “Earth-Based Religion”, and a fun song for the kids, “The Blessèd Bee” (to the tune of “Do You Know the Muffin Man?”). Every entry includes the original tune title and composer or source, in case of a need to double-check the melody.
Primarily, Carterhaugh Books publishes speculative fantasy literature in prose form. For Patricia A. Leslie, parody songwriting is an equally important form of literary self-expression. She trusts that many of her readers will also enjoy her writing in this form.